Behind my eyes

Its kinda funny, when back before I left for YWAM, the term "Newness" had some kind of mystical power behind it. It would fuel my ambitions and desires. The saying "ask and it shall be given" proved itself true. I asked and meditated and prayed and sure enough I was engulfed in a life of "newness." I soaked it up as much as I could and found myself in wanting more. Opportunities presented themselves around every corner. Hard times were had; those were great times. When I can look at where I came from, in just a year and a half, and see how much my life has been changed. I see my story painted out in journal entries, in times where all I had was hope, I am brought to a place of total surrender. To live free of stress and worry is merely a dance and when learned, your steps are sure, your faith is secure. And when you hear those old man lies, you can look back at where you started and where you are now. Now, behind my eyes, all newness is, is change. When you begin walking after That Man, you learn that he is always moving and if you can keep up and get back up, when you fall down. Newness and change becomes...ordinary. Nowadays, I still ask, and by no surprise whatsoever I can honestly say, that I am still receiving and that is ordinary, and I am grateful.

Here, there and back, and now... There!

I read this all the time, and I shall not want

though I find myself lying in green pastures

being subject by what could be,

and the dreams and visions you have for me

These last months, I have been planning a move, a move to Kansas City. Although, I never said it as that, I will be there at lease two months, so yes, we'll call it a move. A lot has happend since I updated. I finished my EARS (Environmental Resource Stewardship School). Not long after, I hopped on a boat with a few rough necks and lived out in Alaska for a month fishing for prawns, working my tale off. Now I have my school paid off, and Im pretty close to broke again. As for Kansas City, well thats easy. My girlfriend is there. Lately, God has been speaking to me about being hasty in all things and how it will lead to sure poverty. Our lives are not meant to be lived at 110 MPH, we need to spend time on things. That includes, friends, family, work, money, ministry, life, God! He knows us well. As he is telling me to "go, to KC." and I'm thinking, what about my ministry? and he is saying "There is ministry there, go."

With not a second to spare to sit and ponder

One month on a boat and with what to show?

I pray that the seeds that I bought

will make it to the garden to sow

God has given me tools, and I know he will have me use them wherever I am at. If it is worship, growing an awesome garden, encouraging or discipling others. Whatever it may be, I trust he will let me know, if it is a new tool I must gain I trust he will provide the means to obtain it. 

How long has it been since I had laid my head

on the soft green grass, seeking your thought

as a soft breeze past with secrets to grasp,

of a soft answer that turns away wrath?

My prayer for as I leave and when I get there, is that I grow and even closer relationship with God than I ever have had before, and not fall deaf or blind to his calling on me. I pray for my relationship with her to be blessed and that we may grow together. I pray for mornings spent in mediation and just listening to his voice. I pray for new friends, new stories and amazing soil.

One thing I learned, as I lived on that boat

Is let the compass guide to keep you on course

This compass points to Kansas City and thats a big thing. Just like all big things, big things require a lot of good faith and for myself, I could use some more of that.

⁴ Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! ⁵ Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. ⁶ Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

 ⁸ Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. ⁹ Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. -Philippians 4:4-8